This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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