Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
