I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
