On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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