Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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