I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
operation have a gay friend backfired
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
