Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
