GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
It was like giving head to a cactus.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
