bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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