if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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