the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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