It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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