Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
