Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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