OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
