We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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