Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
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