that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Randomize
