Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
