do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize
