I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize