maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Randomize
