whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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