GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Just high enough for therapy.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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