too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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