Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
