I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
