that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
