Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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