Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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