she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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