Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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