omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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