Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
