i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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