people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Randomize
