Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
