dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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