he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
is wine microwaveable?
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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