You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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