Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
