That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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