Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
