Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
