At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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