Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
They have beer where we have blood.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
