I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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