no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
