I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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