And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
