You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
