This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
